Stacey Hellman, LCSW-C

You look like you’re holding it all together. But on the inside, you are falling apart.

Can you relate to any of the following?

You’re the dependable one. The responsible one. The one other people turn come to for support. You are an over-achiever and hold yourself to very high standards.

However, inside you’re exhausted from overthinking, questioning yourself, and worrying about disappointing others. You can’t remember the last time you asked for help without feeling guilty. You constantly replay conversations in your head and worry about how you came across to other people. You keep choosing emotionally unavailable partners. You feel responsible for others’ happiness. You struggle with asking for help or dealing with interpersonal conflicts. You feel guilty taking time for yourself or even just having fun.

Maybe you’ve spent so much of your life taking care of everyone else’s needs that you have no idea what you need. Maybe it’s time to find out.

But inside, you’re exhausted from overthinking, questioning yourself, and worrying about disappointing others. Maybe you’ve spent so much of your life taking care of everyone else’s needs that you’re no longer sure what you need. If you can relate to any of this, please know that you are not alone! As humans it’s hard-wired into our DNA to connect with others. I can support you whether you’re brand new to therapy or a “repeat customer.” The fact that you are looking for a therapist is evidence that you care about yourself and want to improve your quality of life. I also care and want to help you thrive!

People who struggle with these patterns typically don’t think of themselves as having experienced trauma. These patterns tend develop in families where emotional needs weren’t consistently noticed, understood, or responded to. Children having this experience grew up learning that keeping the peace, not causing problems, or taking care of others emotionally was necessary to maintain connection with their parents. Sometimes trauma isn’t about obvious bad things that happened to them. Often trauma is about many less obvious things that didn’t happen.

Many clients I’ve worked with have tried therapy in the past and found it somewhat helpful but eventually reached an impasse. I’m here to give you a different experience and help you make lasting changes. Some of the challenges I help people with are people-pleasing, perfectionism, and low self-worth. These issues can manifest as relationship conflicts, addictions, anxiety and a general internal sense of being disconnected from yourself and others.

My approach to therapy is non-traditional, experiential, and integrative. What all of those terms mean is that I treat each person as a whole, I want to see the big picture, and I go beyond “just talk therapy” to help you feel better and live better. To read more about the experiential methods I use, click here.

Let’s be curious together and find out what is getting in the way of your ability to experience joy, have meaningful relationships, and live in a balanced way. Aspects that are helpful to explore are things like: 1) Your core beliefs about yourself and where they came from, 2) What was modeled for you in your family about love and relationships, 3) How you measure your self-worth, 4) How you spend most of your time, energy and money, and 5) What meaning you make about the challenges or pain you have been through. Every person has a unique history and I want to hear anything you’d like to share with me.

My office is located in Ellicott City, Maryland. I primarily do in-person sessions but can provide virtual sessions as needed. Some clients do a “hybrid” which is fine for talk therapy, but all of the experiential methods need to be done in person.